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Learning in "Outer Darkness"

Growing up my mom taught us that if you weren't in the pews at church you were in outer darkness.  I used to laugh, but it help me always be on time to church because I didn't want to be in "outer darkness".  

With social distancing going on in church now, it's hard to get a pew seat in church unless you are there 30 mins early.  Well, this morning I wasn't paying attention to the time and we didn't get there till 10 mins before church started.  Because of this we were back in the cultural hall part of the church.  

This is now the conversation between myself and my oldest daughter, Abree.

Abree:  "Mom, This is so far back!"

Me:  Laugh.  "Yes, this is what your grandma calls 'outer darkness' "

Abree:  Thinks for a second and then says, "Yes!  That's exactly what this is!"  


How do I learn in outer darkness?


I learned early on in college that I can't learn in the back!  It's just not my learning ability.  I get easily distracted and I find myself focused on everything going on around me, not the teacher.  It was easy to talk to the person next to me instead of listening to the lesson being taught.  Depending on the class it was also easy to fall asleep.  As I realized this about myself, I began sitting upfront or close to the front.  This kept me focused on the professor and my grades immediately started improving.

Well, that is something that I follow at church too.  Since I go to church to learn, I recognized my learning abilities and sit as close to the front as possible.  I've been made fun of telling me that I'm a Molly Mormon for sitting on the front row, but for me, it's just how I engage.  I don't care what people think anymore, I do it because it's important to me to learn.  And when you know you have a learning weakness, you do what you can to improve it.

Today at church I found myself focused on all the little kids around me and what they were doing.  I made faces at them (well, as much as you can with a mask on) and waved to them.  They are adorable!  How can I not focus on them?! 

Well, as I'm learning right now, sometimes it's not possible to sit on the front row, or to be in person for learning.  So if you have a personality like mine that is easily distracted, how do you learn?  How do you keep yourself engaged on a zoom lesson when you can see all the other people?

 

Some of my ideas that I am going to put into play for the future:

  • Take notes
  • Make a choice to focus
  • Who am I thinking about while listening?  If I find myself getting distracted by those around me, quickly refocus my thoughts.
  • Make a goal to participate in the class (how many times will I comment?, etc)
  • Put my phone far away - use a computer to log on not my phone
  • Make a goal to be to church early no matter what sacrifice I need to make
  • Don't prejudge the person speaking - have an open heart and know they are doing the best they can under the circumstances they have been given as well


Please feel free to comment or email me with suggestions.  I would love for this to become a conversation!  I would love your input as I also search for my own ways that help. 

Comments

April said…
So true! My key to paying attention is eye contact with the speaker. Even if they cannot see me, I am looking at their eyes. I have had many speakers tell me thank you for being such a good listener for their talk. They appreciate the eye contact because it makes them feel like someone is listening.
November 2, 2020 at 5:50 AM
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