Artwork - Moving Mountains by Eva Timothy
Do you ever feel your body falls short physically, mentally or spiritually of what you wanted?
I know my body does that physically with my chronic fatigue. I'll be doing great and actually make some positive physical strides forward with excise and then my body shuts down. I end up bed ridden for days at a time while my physical body recovers and restores.
Or I wake up in the morning with a whole list of good things I want to accomplish and I finish one, feel accomplished and then don't have the energy to finish another.
Or I pray and pray to change something about myself, like not yelling at my kids, but the next day comes and I find myself yelling at my kids again.
It is frustrating!!
Since last week, I've been really striving to be better at applying some of the lessons from General Conference that stood out to me. One of which, that I shared last week, is the concept of my prayers. Asking Heavenly Father to enlighten my mind, writing it down, and then acting upon it.
Zac and I have been working on tightening up our budget. As we broke everything down we saw how much we spend on groceries and eating out. I was surprised at how high the grocery bill was because I knew we eat out most of the time. But I walked away from the conversation knowing something needed to change. I knew I needed to step up and help. But the thought exhausted me. Thinking about cooking wipes me out before I even do it.
While praying for help with budgeting this last week, I had a strong impression to pray for the mental capacity to be able to meal plan and stick to a budget.
Because Heavenly Father knows me so very well, all my struggles and weaknesses, and because I'm striving to actually hear Him in my prayers, He gave me a word that would cause me to stop and think.
CAPACITY!
Just as my body has a limit with how much it can do, my brain does too. Unfortunately it's one of the trials I have to deal with here in mortality. But it's not a trial that has to limit me if I don't want it to.
Because food planning and budgeting is hard for me, He knew what I needed first was to have my mental capacity increased so I could then hear ideas and have the physical strength to follow through.
I am now asking for capacity in a lot of other aspects of my life.
That one word has changed the way I pray!
I start my prayers with asking for the mental and spiritual capacity to pray.
As I have done this, my prayers have become more personal and less repetitive. I now hear the Lord speak to me in ways that I've missed before. I have more desire to act upon what He has asked me to do during that prayer. Instead of it being a burden when He asks me to do things, it's now a desire because my mental capacity has increased, which in turn increases my spiritual and physical capacity as well.
Prayer is now exciting! It is no longer a checklist, but it's a relationship!
My prayers are now lasting all day. The prayer at the beginning of the day continues throughout the day and many times into the next day. I had always wondered how Enos in the Book of Mormon prayed all day and all night. I always imagined how tired he must have been and how bad his knees hurt from kneeling that long. But after this last week, I'm guessing his prayer was a continual prayer that He kept going throughout the day and into the night.
If you struggle to act upon things the Lord has asked of you, if you struggle with hearing Him, if you struggle with any weakness in this mortal life, ask Him to increase your capacity! You can asked from an increase of physical, mental or spiritual capacity. He is waiting to give us more! He wants to give us more. We need to make room for Him. And if we don't know how to make room, ask for the capacity to make the room!!
When we have the capacity to let Him in, miracles happen in our lives.
Artwork - What are they among so many by Eva Timothy
All Jesus had was 5 loaves of bread and 2 fishes to feed 5000 people. My brain automatically says, you can't do that; that's not enough. But Christ asked for the ability and capacity to feed 5000 people and he did just that with the little he had.
God is asking us to change our thinking!! God is asking us to change our capacity to ask and to do! When we learn to ask for capacity, we will find we can move mountains in our lives!
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